Hi Everyone,
I WILL START THIS POST OFF WITH A LITTLE ANECDOTE...
One day I was working away at my retail job I had a woman ask me how far along I was, if I knew the sex and how I was feeling. Somehow we ended up on the topic of my man, my partner, my boyfriend, not yet my husband. The lady asked me if the father was in the picture and mortified I said, "of course, my boyfriend and I are happy together and just bought a house." I stopped after that and shut down the rest of the conversation. Why did I feel the need to validate my relationship with the father of my child to a complete stranger, and why did it matter if he was my husband or boyfriend? Well whether or not I want to ignore the situation this will never be so there will be many instances where people will judge me for not being in wedlock and baring a child. I have had many encounters like this since that day and although I am not ashamed that he is my boyfriend I have chosen a different word.... "PARTNER" somehow when I say this they don't notice, they don't question and they leave me alone.
I know we live in a changing society and I can understand that old-fashioned is still very much a reality but I want to vouch for every child born out of wedlock like myself, you're parents did NOT make a mistake you are meant to be here no matter how it happened. As I go through this pregnancy I couldn't have chosen a better time for myself to get pregnant. I know that this isn't the case for everyone and that's okay too! Life only gives us as much as we can handle so take a breath... breathe with me. I am due in January and will have time to get my degree before the baby arrives.. I could talk about the criticism i have (almost) received from people who didn't know I was planning on returning in the fall. But theres a time for that in another post. Back to my choice of words in explaining my relationship I just want other women to know that you do not need societies acceptance on the status of your relationship even if the father isn't in the picture know that your baby is here for a reason and although it is difficult to understand know that you don't owe anything to society.
I have returned to calling him my boyfriend because you know what? THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HE IS. Strangers will never know he's my soulmate, my best friend and an absolute dream to come true to be with. He is the man I want to father my children and now he will be. Society is not always going to be harsh and cruel but when it is try and find comfort in knowing that only you know what is right for you and your life.
